Blog

Last June I had a sinus infection, no big deal they happen pretty regularly for me. Then a few weeks later I got stung or bit, by some ground hornets on the back of my head. I handled the situation as I would with any sting and cleaned the area. A few days later while … Continue reading “Emotionally Feeling Crazy, my Wife is a Saint”

Thinking back over my years in practice both community and private practice, I’d never put much thought into if most of the couples I’ve worked with were conflict avoidant or hostile. To be honest there has been a good mix of both. Luckily, I’ve known how to work with them and have been able to … Continue reading “Hostile Couples”

A few days ago, I saw a short video clip of Esther Perel standing on stage and she asked the crowd to raise their hand if they’ve ever thought about leaving their current partner. Many of the people in the crowd raised their hand. I was right there with them, I have had times where … Continue reading “Sometimes I Want Out of This”

The issue messing up your relationship isn’t that your partner doesn’t listen, that you’re a workaholic or because you and your partner don’t communicate well. None of these are the REAL problem. The problem is neither you nor your partner are self-regulating. I’ll explain self-regulation but first I need to explain your nervous system in … Continue reading “The Issue Messing up your Relationship”

I am asking that you to think back to when you first began dating your current partner. Think about the thoughts and emotions related to being in a new relationship. What thoughts/emotions come up? I’ve heard people say anything from exciting to nervous and hopeful. Many people want to spend as much time together as … Continue reading “Bonding”

This month I thought I would write about an online course which I am revamping and releasing soon, Fight Nice! The idea for the group came while listening to a podcast episode from Jay Shetty, who said that couples need to learn how to fight appropriately, not that fighting should be avoided. First of all, … Continue reading “Fight Nice!”

  There is a problem that is pretty common in couples’ therapy. The problem is that while it seems some improvements have occurred in your relationship, but now other issues are popping up. You and or your partner maybe talking about dropping couples therapy or finding a new therapist because this should not be happening! … Continue reading “What is happening?”

Often times, Couples are not really sure what they are getting into when the process of couples therapy is started. They maybe unsure what to expect regarding the therapist and what the therapist may expect from them. Often times, couples will approach therapy with the idea they are expected to describe their problems with their … Continue reading “What You Need To Know Before Beginning Couples’ Therapy”

Many of us have heard horror stories which have come about because of bullying whether online or in-person by peers. Let’s be honest, kids can be terrible. But what about adults? What is the responsibility of adults, from teachers to parents to coaches and so on? We all play a role in how we manage … Continue reading “Bullying”

Anxiety is something we all deal with to some extent; it cannot be completely avoided. However, if you have OCD, you know struggles on a regular basis are difficult. The compulsion or ritual to avoid a perceived stressor seems to provide relief temporarily. Instead, folks tend to get caught into a cycle of repeated behaviors … Continue reading “OCD”

As a Marriage and family therapist, I see the need for teamwork all over the place and appreciate the value of working with others. Specifically, I am speaking of family, and this must be broken down to spouses.  If spouses don’t work together, there is likely a disconnect which will then play out within the … Continue reading “Being a Team Player”

The title alone may have brought on anxiety for you, I know it tends to for me. I have a 13-year-old son that let’s just say some days are good and others, not so good. The annual doctor’s appointment for my teenage son still sticks into my mind as the Pediatrician looked at my wife and … Continue reading “Parenting a Teen”

So, we know about the mask mandates and arguments for and against getting vaccinations, we know about the deaths from COVID-19 and whether any sense of normalcy from the past will ever return, and we know about CDC guidelines and how they can be odd and even confusing at times in regard to staying home … Continue reading “Future Anxiety Crisis or Over-reaction?”

Have you ever made plans and internally set a goal? Maybe it was around weight loss or starting your own company. Either way, as the time to begin got closer and closer was there any second guessing? Some people hear a voice in their head telling them they aren’t good enough or ready for attempting … Continue reading “Fear of Failing”

Have you ever noticed your partner getting upset? Do you know what are some ways he or she calms down? Well if you answered yes to these then good news, your in a pretty normal relationship. But I wonder, do you and or your partner share this information with one another? Or better yet, do … Continue reading “Co-Regulation and Couples”

As a parent I am just blown away by all the terrible things online. To be fair, there are beneficial items online for educational purposes. No lie, I love jamming to music on applications as much as the next person. But recently, my wife pointed out songs our eldest son has been listening to that … Continue reading “Parenting around the Internet”

Hypnotherapy I’ve found can bring about different reactions. Some people view hypnotherapy as mind control. Others can see it’s an intervention for treating several areas such as, smoking cessation, pain management, relaxation, weight loss, regression work (current and past life) and many more areas. If you are one of the people seeing the many benefits … Continue reading “Online Hypnotherapy”

There are many similarities in terms of benefits between individual and couples therapy online. The first idea that is a benefit of online individual therapy is the privacy aspect. You can literally go into a room at home, close the door, put ear buds or a headset on and we can process whatever issues bring … Continue reading “Online Individual Therapy”

Online therapy is a great way for working with couples. Obviously being in the comfort of your own home is an excellent advantage due convenience and accessibility.  It is also great because this may be one of the first opportunities the couple had to sit down and process relationship struggles. Making Time to Talk Couples … Continue reading “Online Therapy and Couples”

There are several facets of relationships which are important, but none are more important than one’s ability to self-soothe.  When one partner is feeling emotionally vulnerable, it is important for them to be able to temporarily regulate their emotions.  The reason is that at times, your partner may not be available, perhaps because they are … Continue reading “Mutual Self-Soothing”